For some reason, it’s always on the top of our (me and my friends’) minds. Whether it’s our religion constantly reminding us that we are not fulfilling the full measure of our creation, our family constantly demanding cute grandchildren and fun in-laws, or whether it’s actually an inborn ‘tick-tock’ of the clicking biological clock, rarely does a day go by that I (or a friend) am not reminded of my single-ness.
… And yes, despite my constant dodging of the issue, I have to admit that I am finally getting to the point where I might enjoy someone to share the rest of my life’s experiences with.
But I will say that when this single stuff is all said and done (which hopefully it will be someday), I won’t have regretted a moment of it. I have gotten to know amazing people I would have never known, had career opportunities I would have never taken otherwise, and gone on adventures I would have never anticipated if I weren’t single. I have had incredible freedom to become the person I want to become, shaped by the friends, family members, and clergy that I have surrounded myself with.
I am a little disturbed by the tone of despair that I hear in other singles’ conversations. I think some times we are so caught up in our ‘singleness’ that we forget how incredibly lucky we are. Sure, we all ‘want somebody to love’ as the songster wrote, but we shouldn’t ignore the fact that as singles we have the wind at our backs and nothing by possibilities in front of us.
I believe in marriage and family, but it’s no secret that having a spouse and kids at an early age is a lot to expect of someone, and a veritable ball-and-chain which limits the amount of risk your decision making can tolerate. In fact, for every person who has demanded ‘where is your wife?’ there has been someone else saying, ‘you know, I think you might be onto something – take your time and choose wisely.’
When all is said and done, I am right around the national average for people settling down and looking for a spouse. Even though I have never been satisfied with ‘average’ in most areas of my life, in this I think I am perfectly content to be right where I am.