LDS General Conference

The Mo-Net (aka the Bloggernacle, aka the Mormon subculture on the internet) is flooded this morning with reactions, insights and inspirations from the semi-annual general conference of the church.

Here are my key take-aways this year.

1. Every conference session begins with the same television preamble “This is the (insert number here) General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”  This year was 179th.  If it weren’t for the semi-annual stating of this number, I never would have learned how to say the “nds” and “ths” in Portuguese.  In other words, “One hundred and seventy ninth” translates to “Centesimo septuagesimo nono.”  Tough stuff!
2. We attend 10 hours of General Conference over a two day period.  … And, it’s commercial free…  10 hours!  Part of the problem is that there’s 15 main leaders in our church, and by golly we want to hear from all of them at least 15 minutes.  Then, some of them we want to hear twice.  Wedge in a few of our women leaders and some of the up-and-comers, and voila!  Ten hours of Church in one weekend!
3. The Mormon Tabernacle Choir is just great.  Here are a few highlights there:
   • My wife and I discovered that between us, we personally know 100% of the black men in the choir.  (There are two.  She knows one and I know one.)
   • While the MoTab is incredibly skilled and miraculously grand, the over 300 voice choir has a DEARTH of diversity. Yes, Asian woman and Latin/poly looking dude are always prominently placed for the camera angles.
   • Cheekbone guy was more promiently featured than usual.  Does he have a wife on the production crew?
   • Mack Wilburg makes me smile.  I love the way he mouths the words, even on the quiet songs it looks like he would be shouting them if he were actually vocalizing.
   • Just wondering… does the choir get all their suits and dresses from Mr. Mac clothing stores?  Seems like a natural fit for (former?) choir president Mac Christensen.
4. President Monson, the church’s presiding authority, mentioned in just in passing that he knew an individual personally that another General Authority had briefly referenced in his talk just previous.  This confirms my suspicion that President Monson actually knows everyone who has ever walked the earth.  (Especially the sweet widows in his Salt Lake ward)
5. Inspired by President Monson’s story about being called up, unannounced, as a deacon’s quorum secretary to give an accounting of his service, the twelve years olds of the church should stand advised and ready for a renaissance of impromptu talks and testimonies in Sacrament, Stake, and Leadership meetings.  Little Brothers, take a page from my book.  The one time I was called out of a congregation to give a talk/testimony impromptu, I was absent from church that day.
6. Will President Uchtdorf ever tell a story that isn’t about aviation?  I’m beginning to lose hope. (ha ha.. I’m so funny!  Did you catch my vague reference to his October conference address there?)
7. Final question: Will I ever make it through this 10-hour marathon without getting emotional at least once?  Sometimes I wonder if it’s out of sheer fatigue, or if I’m really inspired.  Then I realize, yup I’m actually being inspired. (Cause I just woke up from a nap, so it can’t be fatigue.)