Theater or Theatre

Here are some little known details about my illustrious theatrical career.  Note that I am answering these questions partly from the perspective of an actor, and partly from the persepctive of a stage manager.

LAST SHOW ADDED TO YOUR RESUME:
Divas Concert (I was not a diva, though – I stage managed them.)

LAST SHOW YOU AUDITIONED FOR:
I can’t remember… I don’t think I’ve auditioned for something since college.

DID YOU GET IT?
I got every role I auditioned for… ha ha ha.  But honestly, since I studied directing I have an acute awareness of what I am/am not cast-able as.  So I only audition if I (as the director) would actually cast myself in the role.

LAST SONG/MONOLOGUE YOU USED AT AN AUDITION:
I have no recollection.

FAVORITE MUSICAL(s):
Fantasticks (so simple and poetic), Ragtime (one of the last great musicals of the old tradition), Once Upon a Mattress (farce is fun – and it has sentimental value), Sweeney Todd (still want to direct this one some day), Into the Woods (who cares if Sondheim is wordy and didactic.  I love him!)

FAVORITE PLAY(s):
Hmm… the only one that comes to mind is Bridge and Tunnel, the one woman show that Sarah Jones did a few years ago on Broadway.  Last play I saw that I truely loved.

FAVORITE ROLE YOU’VE PLAYED, AND FROM WHAT SHOW?
Every role I have ever played I’ve wanted to do over based on the experience I’ve had since.  Therefore, I resent every role I ever played.

FAVORITE ROLE OVERALL THAT I WOULD LOVE TO PLAY:
Don Quixote/Man of La Mancha, El Gallo/Fantasticks

SUPERSTITION:
I don’t believe many of those theatre superstitions.  But I try to respect those who do… even if they are nuts. I do believe that a good visualization/walk through yields incredible results.

YOUR GOAL IN SHOW BUSINESS:
Have fun and get the audience to their feet.

FAVORITE DIRECTOR YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH:
As a stage manager, I had to maintain impeccable relationships with every director I worked with – so I genuniely tried to find the good in each one.  But there were drawbacks and blind spots in each one as well.  (All directors have them)  I will always have a soft spot for my high school drama director, Mike Eaton.  I will also take this opportunity to say that my least favorite director was someone who was an ‘aural’ learner.  In other words, he had to talk through everything.  He wasn’t visual at all – just aural.  So every communication with him was a total verbailzation of every detail of everything.  Tedious and tiresome!

WHAT WAS YOUR VERY FIRST SHOW?
Well, I think I was in the church christmas play as a baby and toddler, but the first real show was when I was 12 years old.  I was “Soy Bean” in California-Run-Around – a loosely constructed musical review – that was done at a local community theatre.  I had a solo “Somewhere Out There” with Angels as backup singers.  I’d give my right leg to get my hands on a copy of that show.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DANCE SOLO?
I am a horrible dancer.  In fact, I was supposed to do a solo soft shoe as I sang my solo in Once Upon a Mattress, and the choreographer quickly gave up on me when she realized I basically didnt’ know my right foot from left and couldn’t count to 8.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A SINGING SOLO?
Yes.  A long time ago.  I haven’t had a solo in a show for years and years.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THE LAST PERSON TO TAKE A BOW?
Nope, but I have been the one who stole the crowd’s roar before the final bow.  🙂  And I’m totally OK with that.

But I’ve never taken the final bow — unless you consider my ‘bow’ the fact that all the actors lived through the show, were clothed, lit, and heard throughout, and made it on to take their bow, then yes – I get the last bow every time! (Ah, the thankless work of a Stage Manager)

HAVE YOU BEEN TO NEW YORK?
Yes.  The real quesition is how long has it been since I’ve been to NYC, and the answer is… TOO LONG!  Two years.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO LA?
Yes, and LA is trash.

WHAT’S THE SCARIEST PART OF AN AUDITION?
Being on the actor side of the table.  Being on the director side of the table is fun.

WHAT’S THE BEST PART OF AN AUDITION?
When they are over.  Also it’s kind of fun to audition really really bad actors.

NAME A SHOW YOU WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN:
I’ve always been a horrible memorizer.. so I seem to recall making it through several shows where I had to go offstage after each scene to consult my script as to my next lines/scene.  Usually if we skip pages of dialogue in a play, it was my fault.  Those are the ones I’d never do again.

NAME A SHOW YOU COULD DO FOR YEARS:
None of them.  I get tired of a show very easily.

WHAT ARE YOU AUDITIONING FOR NEXT?
Nothing.  I should be a in a show, huh.  Too bad I have my union card is a huge limitation for me as an actor.  (When you’re a member of the union, you can’t work on non-union shows – so my options are very limited)

DO YOU KEEP IN TOUCH WITH PAST CAST MEMBERS?
No.  There are just too many.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW IMPORTANT IS GETTING PAID?
Well, since I have other sources of income, the money isn’t super-important anymore.  I still say being paid is very important because 1) it signals the seriousness of the company in hiring good actors and stage managers 2) it obligates people more – they become employees who perform a function for reenmueration.  I can’t tell you how frustrating it is as an actor, director, and stage manager to deal with someone who isn’t being paid (or who feels like their grossly underpaid) who walk around with a chip on their shoulder, feeling like they’re doing everyone else a favor by being there.

SOMETHING EMBARRASSING OR UNEXPECTED THAT HAPPENED TO YOU WHILE ON STAGE?
Chasing a pooping horse around.  Having to run out and grab scenery that is about to fly off the stage toward audience members.  Doing a scene with my zipper down.  Having my fake moustache come off halfway through the play – while on stage in my final scene – because of profuse sweating and really poor toupe tape.

WHO IS THE MOST DIFFICULT PERSON (ON STAGE OR OFF) THAT YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH?
I have worked with a plethora of awful actors.  The best actors in the world understand that it’s a JOB.  They come to work, do their work, and go home.  The bad/difficult ones are the ones who waste all of your time (as a manager) with their little teenager games.  He said/she said.  He bit me.  She hit me.  He dropped me.

WHAT IS YOUR ONSTAGE PET PEEVE?
Actors who don’t look at you when they’re talking to you.  People who are just ‘phoneing it in’ during a long run.

WHAT IS YOUR BACKSTAGE PET PEEVE?
Talking, people who are in the way, people who hang out in the wings, people to take pictures from the wings, people who are clueless as to what is happening out there, people who forget there are live people on the other side of that fourth wall.

EVER BEEN NAKED ONSTAGE? WOULD YOU?
Hell no, and hell no.  My mother might be in the audience!

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KILLED?
No.  Not in real life or on stage.

BEEN DRUNK?
Only comically. Not for seriousness.

PLAYED SOMEONE HALF YOUR AGE?
No.

PLAYED SOMEONE TWICE YOUR AGE?
Yes!  All the time.  In HS and college I only played fathers and old men.  I guess I have some kind of gravitas… either that or I’ve always been the biggest/more believable of my peers.

CRIED?
No.  Crying is for sissies. 🙂

FIRED A GUN?
No.  But I’ve prepared many a gun to be fired.

BEEN DRENCHED?
Yes… outdoor theater at it’s finest – torrential rainstorms!

BEEN IN A DREAM SEQUENCE?
My life is a dream sequence.

BEEN KISSED?
I try to work a kiss into every role I have.  Just to keep things fresh.  Sometimes, onstage, I just throw one in where I feel it’s necessary.  I’ve thrown many an actress off with that tactic.  Sometimes it can be hard if you’re in an all-male cast, but you have to do what you have to do for the art!  (just kidding…)